Several weeks ago I firmed Leicester for medicine and haven't looked back.
Tomorrow I will have my final exam heralding my final year of being a biomedical student. After 11:30 tomorrow, I will walk away from the haematology and transfusion sciences paper and forget every last pointless thing I forced myself to learn throughout these last three years.
Honestly I'm exhausted. Had a bit of an incident yesterday - vasovagal syncope, terrible timing as I was in the shower at the time. This not being my first time, I forced myself to stay conscious to get to my room where I blacked out on the floor (after failed attempt to elevate my legs) and came round on my back with my fingers stiff and everything slurred, weak, tingling and phosphined like Christmas in my cornea.
Good heavens it was terrifying.
The chest pain, fatigue and dizziness is still there and I'm ashamed to say I had to get help. My friend was treated to a fine rendition of 'last dying hours' over the phone and came rushing to my house armed with cake. Poor girl, she must have been horrified to find a towel-clad me on the floor looking like a victim of ritualistic exsanguination.
Ah me. Cake, tea, water, omelette, miso soup and faffing over the revision I should be doing later and I was fretting over the exam I had to do the following afternoon. I honestly have no idea how I made it into university or how I managed to sit the exam no less know what I was talking about.
Suffice it to say it was not an experience I have any interest in repeating. Generally I'd not been eating, sleeping or drinking enough and the shower was very hot so I felt like I was suffocating which are all risk-factors of vasovagal syncope. But I've had all of the above and never had the attack due to those symptoms alone.
The only common denominator was stress, so I've decided to better organise my life to avoid unnecessary stress and unnecessary dependence on people. There's such an embarrassment around the fact you could have prevented things by simply doing a little exercise so that you feel ok eating, drinking enough, sleeping reasonable hours and beginning revision back when you should have and not two weeks before your third-year exams.
Fingers crossed for tomorrow!